When People Weigh in On Subjects that Aren’t Their Business

As an eighteen year old, I have a lot of people weighing in on what they think I should do/be in the future. “Oh, you have your degree already? Well you should go for a Masters now!” or alternatively, with a fake smile that says this-girl’s-lost-her-marbles-the-poor-thing, “Oh you mean your associates degree?” Those are the two most frequent that I hear.

Something else I’ve seen and heard has bothered me even more, though. It’s the idea that someday I’m going to have to grow up and stop being the book-inhaling, obsessively blogging, sometimes-immature fangirl that I am. That one day it won’t be acceptable to have a borderline-obsessive relationship with Sherlock, Supernatural, Harry Potter, and any other movie/show/book that I get my hands on. Of course I’m more than that, but it makes up a big part of who I am. Ask anyone, and they’ll tell you that I talk the most when it’s about one of those three things. I’m usually pretty quiet, but the trick is to get me to shut up when I get on a tangent.

So here’s my question: Why should I have to give up my passion? Is there some sort of unspoken age where I have to delete my tumblr account, sell all my books, cancel Netflix, and begin reading the newspaper while watching the news? Is this some sort of rite of passage I don’t know about? If so, I don’t like it, and refuse to participate.

Bilbo NoIt’s the concept that all of these hobbies and passions are somehow less than ideal for a successful, actualized adult. There was one situation a while ago where I started talking to someone, and found out that they liked Supernatural, but apparently not as much as I do. I yammered his ear off, getting into deep analysis and symbolism and whatnot (because I thought I had found one of my people). His response? “That’s weird.” I never heard from him again.

Maybe I’m alone in this, or maybe I just don’t know the right people, but the above is pretty much the reason why I keep my hobbies to myself. I don’t ever want to lose this part of who I am. People have told me that guys won’t appreciate the oddities of Kayla, and that I’ll be very lucky if I find someone who’s just as into this stuff as I am, but that I might have to compromise. Which I’m fine with – but there’s a difference between compromise and self-sacrifice.

And you know what I’ve decided? It’s better to stay a child and be a lonely virgin for the rest of my life than to stop everything that gives me purpose and passion in life.

Deal with it cumberbatch


18 thoughts on “When People Weigh in On Subjects that Aren’t Their Business

  1. Yes,my thoughts exactly! Where I come from,it is unheard of to want to be a writer and read gazillions of books! I have kept my blogging life to myself but the news that I read more than my family does in a year is shocking and I have gotten remarks as ridiculous as “take a break and help in the kitchen”. And my writing aspirations? They shake their head and think of how unattainable it is!
    So,I get you and thank you for sharing. I know there are people like me! ^-^ Sorry about the long rant though.. πŸ˜›

    • Rant away! And when someone tells you to get in the kitchen and stop reading I give you full permission to throw a hardback version of Game of Thrones at their head. Or – better yet – a hardback version of Les Miserables.

  2. Im 32 years old and I still would be consideted childish and odd in my hobbies and the things I do and collect. And I dont care one bit on what people think because its who I am and will go to the grave like that. I have obessions like you do with books and art and comic books and movies. And do the same as you do when you get on a topic and just go on about it. It took awhile but it was till my late 20s to find someone like me and allows me to be me so keep doing what your doing and be you. Never fake it. Great post.

    Side question how do you get your animated gifs to work I cant get mine to animate.

    • Well I’ll keep being patient then and rely on my online friends for moral support!

      I’ve found that you can’t resize them at all – you have to keep them at full size. That’s what was wrong with mine! Hope that helps!

  3. I’ll say this — only knowing you through your blogging, you’re the most mature, put-together 18-year-old I’ve ever come in contact with. Let’s be frank: most kids your age are idiots, and older adults can be condescending; it drove me crazy when I was your age. Don’t change. You’re a very fortunate young adult. You know who you are — how many people your age can say the same? The rest of your life is a really long time, so don’t be in a hurry. Some day you’ll find someone who appreciates and loves you exactly the way you are.

  4. I’m 20 years older than you and I still haven’t grown up! Don’t intend to either. I work for an insurance company and I talk about books, video games and various other geeky things as and when they pop into my head. I don’t actually care if people think I’m a bit strange (although it makes me kind of sad sometimes when I come up with an exceptionally geeky reference and no one knows what I’m talking about). But, I like who I am and I think that my interests are interesting.

    Be exactly who you are and change for no one. It will make it so much more satisfying when you finally meet people who ‘get’ you.

    • OH that’s the worst feeling… You’re so proud of yourself for making an ingenious reference and then you get blank stares. “What must it be like in your funny little heads?” is what I think πŸ˜€

  5. Pingback: End of Year Book Survey | The Thousand Lives

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